Thursday Thoughts: Happy Valentine's Day

Thursday Thoughts: Happy Valentine's Day

Well, my "real job" got the better of me yesterday, so I did not get a chance to write "Where in the World Wednesday" on my blog this week. However, I figure since I where I actually was, was at work, who would want to hear about it anyway? So, my regular Wednesday column will resume next week. Besides...Today is Valentine's Day, or as I like to call it...

The Single-Woman's-Second-Favorite Holiday!

Although I am saying this to be tongue-and-cheek, with the exception of being alone on New Year's Eve, I know no other holiday that strikes so much terror and fear in the hearts of single women. I've been listening to sad, nobody-loves-me stories all week.

I'll admit that until recently, I used to tell sad stories too. Worse, I used to believe them. But now that I'm older and (hopefully!) wiser, being single is no longer something that I perceive as a curse. I have no Bridget Jones-like nightmares of my half-clothed body lying on the floor, tragically alone, being eaten alive by dogs. Life is too short for that.

If you are one of those fortunate women who happen to be single like me, here are a couple of tips that will help make your singleness on this auspicious Couples Day seem less challenging.

1. Learn to Appreciate the Simple, Single Life. Don't get me wrong, marriage and family is wonderful, and I'd like to have both one day. Just remember that not everyone that you meet has a wonderful marriage. Talk to someone that you know who isn't happily married and they will tell you how hard holding it all together really is. As a single, you have a lot of simplicity that you can appreciate.

2. Remind Yourself that its OK to be single. While it may be a single-woman's perception that everyone around you is happily coupled up, take a closer look and realize that's happy successful marriages are neither the norm nor the case. I live in a state where the divorce rate has been reported to be between 68-85%, depending on who you choose to ask. So, remind yourself that whether you're a never-been-married or recently-divorced person, its OK to be single. I like to remind myself of this by quoting George Washington, who liked to say, "Tis better to be alone than in bad company."

3. Treat Yourself to a Romantic Dinner. Tonight, I'm ordering out for Prime Rib from one of my favorite restaurants. I'm going to bring my delicious dinner home, turn off my ringer, set a TV tray with my best china, and pop chick-flicks into my DVD. Then, unless the state of California decides its a great night for an earthquake, I'll enjoy a quiet dinner in with my favorite person...ME. It'll be just like Jennifer Lopez did in "The Wedding Planner." I always loved that scene. She was a single woman who took care of good herself, napkin rings and all.

My best word of advice for single women on Valentine's Day is be kind to yourself. Don't obsess, don't be frustrated, and don't ever think that not having a relationship makes you less of a person. It might be a challenge to keep on the positive side of things, but remember, being in a relationship with someone else does not define who you are. The only relationship that defines you, is the relationship that you have with yourself. Make it a good one.

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