The What Ifs

"The What Ifs" or "Here's Another Truth Bracelet For You"

Capitola Girl has been struggling with a dilemma the past month, because she let her guard down and trusted someone that turned out to be keeping an important truth from her. Its hard for Capitola Girl to pretend to be her usual happy self, when someone else decides to omit details that controls her access to the truth. Especially since this untruth led Capitola Girl to believe something was true when it was not. The discovery of the truth is a relief, but was not without some disillusionment. She's spent a little-too-much time wondering if there was something she could have done or asked to avoid it. All the "What If's."

Capitola Girl has some unsolicited relationship advice for whoever wants to take it. If you find yourself omitting facts to protect others from the truth, you need to consider how deception breaks down trust, and undermines a person's ability to have confidence, not just in you, but in her ability to trust her self.

Deception certainly comes in handy when you want to limit other people's choices and influence their behavior towards you, but to the ones that were deceived, it leaves behind some messy consequences. Even if you're not around to see them. It's strange how one lie of omission can take all the good feelings that two people shared, and make them seem like they weren't real. Or worse, that to the other person, Capitola Girls feelings and right to make an informed choice were not her own.

Because she feels confused and in need of other wisdom today, Capitola Girl is posting this simple pearl and crystal bracelet, because simple is good. Although she ended up with some hurt on her hands, she knows that somewhere under all her mixed up feelings, there is a lesson that she will learn. Hopefully Santayana was right when he said, "Wisdom comes by disillusionment." From where Capitola Girl sits, she learned that deception hurt a very good match in a single instant, and sent it hurdling in the opposite direction at an even higher speed.